If you decide to get married, you may not only get a new partner for life, but step children that will become part of your family. Of course, all children are different coming from different backgrounds and situations, but the tips presented here will more than likely provide some help. The strategies that follow will help you learn how to interact with your new step children on a daily basis.
Your role as a stepparent will be much easier if your stepchildren are assured that you do not want to replace their natural parent. It's necessary to make this clear to your stepchildren if and when they are old enough to grasp the situation. You also don't want to start off behaving too much like a parent, as the children won't appreciate this. Let them know that you want to be their friend, but at the same time you have to support your partner in any issues involving discipline. Juggling the diametrically opposed roles of friend and authority figure can be a little complex and will probably not happen all at once.
If your step children are teenagers, this is a different situation than becoming a step parent to young children. With teens, you can't expect to be seen as a parent, so don't even try to take on this role. The teenagers may not accept you, but this does not mean you have no power or control now that you are in their life. Remember, teachers and other people in these children's lives also have authority over them just as you should at-home. You should be aware that your role as their step parent is a combination of one of friendship and authority. Teens, as a general rule, do not accept things very easily, especially a new parent that is seen as replacing the biological one that is now gone.
One problem you must avoid if both you and your new spouse have brought children into the marriage is to not be partial to your own kids. Your natural behavior will be, of course, to prefer your children. It's a normal reaction and it's hard to overcome. It's of prime importance to make sure both you and your spouse treat all the children brought into your marriage the same. This will be a very important key to success for your new family and your marriage. Be that as it may, there will be situations and times when it's not possible to treat everyone the same. This is primarily true if some of the children are older. Two important areas to be especially attentive to are when it's necessary to discipline a child or when you are rewarding a child for something special they did. You must be vigilantly aware of your behavior in these situations, particularly if your bond to your step-kids isn't as solid as your bond to your own kids. It may be easier to be irritated by a particular behavior when it manifests in your step-kids than in your own kids, but you must train yourself not to differentiate between the two and let your kids do things you forbid your stepchildren from doing.
As a step parent, it would be ideal for the stepchildren to accept you from day one, something that traditionally does not occur. It is important that you keep a positive frame of mind realizing that you will have a solid and happy family in the future once the step children have had time to adjust to you. The acceptance by your step children will come over time; allow enough time to pass and you will, eventually, be an accepted member of their family.
Most people understand that parenting is incredibly challenging. However, many people have also found that having a video gaming system for the children can make everything easier. Check with the local video game shop to find out more.
Your role as a stepparent will be much easier if your stepchildren are assured that you do not want to replace their natural parent. It's necessary to make this clear to your stepchildren if and when they are old enough to grasp the situation. You also don't want to start off behaving too much like a parent, as the children won't appreciate this. Let them know that you want to be their friend, but at the same time you have to support your partner in any issues involving discipline. Juggling the diametrically opposed roles of friend and authority figure can be a little complex and will probably not happen all at once.
If your step children are teenagers, this is a different situation than becoming a step parent to young children. With teens, you can't expect to be seen as a parent, so don't even try to take on this role. The teenagers may not accept you, but this does not mean you have no power or control now that you are in their life. Remember, teachers and other people in these children's lives also have authority over them just as you should at-home. You should be aware that your role as their step parent is a combination of one of friendship and authority. Teens, as a general rule, do not accept things very easily, especially a new parent that is seen as replacing the biological one that is now gone.
One problem you must avoid if both you and your new spouse have brought children into the marriage is to not be partial to your own kids. Your natural behavior will be, of course, to prefer your children. It's a normal reaction and it's hard to overcome. It's of prime importance to make sure both you and your spouse treat all the children brought into your marriage the same. This will be a very important key to success for your new family and your marriage. Be that as it may, there will be situations and times when it's not possible to treat everyone the same. This is primarily true if some of the children are older. Two important areas to be especially attentive to are when it's necessary to discipline a child or when you are rewarding a child for something special they did. You must be vigilantly aware of your behavior in these situations, particularly if your bond to your step-kids isn't as solid as your bond to your own kids. It may be easier to be irritated by a particular behavior when it manifests in your step-kids than in your own kids, but you must train yourself not to differentiate between the two and let your kids do things you forbid your stepchildren from doing.
As a step parent, it would be ideal for the stepchildren to accept you from day one, something that traditionally does not occur. It is important that you keep a positive frame of mind realizing that you will have a solid and happy family in the future once the step children have had time to adjust to you. The acceptance by your step children will come over time; allow enough time to pass and you will, eventually, be an accepted member of their family.
Most people understand that parenting is incredibly challenging. However, many people have also found that having a video gaming system for the children can make everything easier. Check with the local video game shop to find out more.
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